


clicking

by neradia3



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: F/F, Missing Scene, Planet 7, episode 2x06, lots of metaphors, the start of Isobel's sapphic awakening, whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:15:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24263449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neradia3/pseuds/neradia3
Summary: Blaire tells Isobel that kissing women feels like bliss. Isobel wants to feel that too.orIsobel dances with Blaire at Planet 7.
Relationships: Isobel Evans/Blaire
Kudos: 8





	clicking

Isobel and Kyle had stopped dancing after she suggested that he should let her... well, something like "probe Uranus," and her not-so-subtle gesture was gently rejected. He was into another woman, which Isobel thought, good for him for saying "no" because of other conflicting feelings. Or not so conflicting. Isobel didn't know. She wasn't exactly a mind reader. He could've been "for sure" about these feelings, about this other someone else that he brought up. It seemed like he was, which she didn't mind. 

She really thought that she was going to hook-up with Kyle Valenti tonight, but now any chance of that happening was out the window. At least she tried, right?

"It's just... there's someone else," Kyle told her as they stood at the bar. 

Isobel hummed and crossed her arms. Before she could get another word out--maybe some to show her disappointment, but acceptance--the blonde, but really attractive, bartender's own voice traveled through her ears. She wanted to cut in. She wanted to dance with Kyle. Isobel didn't even know the bartender, who she wasn't sure the name of, was next to her until she said something. Her guess was that the bartender was finally off shift, and maybe took interest in Kyle since she first served them the Meteor Shower Shooters.

"I'm not really in the mood, Blaire."

So, the bartender had a name, and Kyle somehow knew it. Had he been to Planet 7 before? That would be surprising. 

"Not you, breeder."

Wait, what?

Blaire cut in between Isobel and Kyle, a smile tugging at her lips. "Hi." She trailed her hand down Isobel's arm, which ended up in Isobel's own before she moved past her and let go. 

Isobel chuckled and watched Blaire. Her hips swayed as she went backwards onto the dance floor, and Isobel let her eyes wander, studying Blaire for a moment. They way her hips moved, smooth, yet enticing. How her eyes sparkled under the glimmering lights that changed colors every now and then. They were pulling her too. So were her lips as they smirked at the sudden burst of curiosity and temptation. 

She looked back at Kyle, who was leaning against the bar. He nodded for her to go. Maybe winked at her. She was already trying to process what Blaire had just asked of her to pick up on any subtle hints like a wink. All she could feel was her stomach bubbling up with nerves, or maybe it was excitement. 

From across the dance floor, Blaire held her hand out towards Isobel, waiting for her to take it. And she did, Blaire pulling her close. Isobel swore she could feel her heart skip, then pick up its pace. It could be their closeness, how their hips moved in sync to the pop tune. How Blaire's eyes stared down Isobel, burning into her, despite the ease in them. Soft and gentle, but wanting. 

Isobel was swimming, engulfed in the bluest of waters, surrounded in warmth like a tight hug. She couldn't hear the music anymore, muffled as each lyric sunk deeper and deeper under the waves. Lights shined over her, ones from the stars and the moon. Or maybe it was the colored light above them. Either way, the gems near her eyes sparkled with them. So did Blaire's. 

Fish jumped around her, dancing too like the butterflies flying around in her stomach. Was that what she was feeling? Butterflies? They were just dancing. They were just dancing. 

Why was she feeling like that? She hadn't felt like this since-- Isobel exhaled and shoved the thoughts away, tucking them deep into her mind so maybe she would forget about them. She came to Planet 7 to have fun. Not to stress herself out over whatever she was feeling. 

She kept her eyes on Blaire, trying to enjoy herself like she told herself that she would. She mirrored Blaire's movements, which slowed with the end of the song and then shift into another, one more quiet and intimate. 

Isobel stopped dancing and looked around her for a moment, people pairing up and swaying together as one. Bodies were pressed against bodies, hands on another's hips or on their shoulders. Some embraced. She could go sit down, grab another drink, abandon Blaire on the dance floor because she didn't want to feel whatever she was feeling anymore. They confused her, rope tied to her wrists, pulling her back and forth. It itched against her skin, and she just wanted it to stop. 

Blaire must've noticed that she seemed off, putting her hand on Isobel's arm. "You okay?"

Isobel's hazel eyes met Blaire's blue ones. They drew her in. God, even with the limited amount of lighting, they were beautiful. Maybe that was what made them beautiful. They lit up a path for her, calmed her. Or maybe that was Blaire's hand on her arm, skin brushing against skin. And as much as Isobel didn't want to admit it, it gave her goosebumps. 

"Yeah, I'm fine. I just--

"You've never danced with a woman before?" Blaire asked. "I guess I read wrong."

Isobel shook her head. "I don't know what I am. I'm still trying to process all this."

"If you want to talk it out, we can go sit down. You don't have to dance with me if you don't want to, Blondie."

"Isobel. It's Isobel."

Blaire chuckled. "Do you want to dance with me, Isobel?"

Isobel tilted her head to the side, conflicted. She did like what she was physically feeling right now, how Blaire's hand felt on her skin. She moved it up and down, perhaps in a comforting manner. But everything she was feeling internally scared her. 

She didn't exactly know how to go about describing it, pushing past it, allowing herself to try something new. Dancing with a woman, with Blaire. Slowly. Swaying, like everyone else on the dance floor. It was weird, standing there as she talked with Blaire. She was under a spotlight, pressure on her shoulders. She ached. But she took a deep breath in and exhaled, and stepped forward, one step closer to Blaire. She grinned. 

Blaire understood, although no words left Isobel's lips, and moved her hands to Isobel's waist. "Is this okay?"

Isobel placed her hands on Blaire's shoulders and nodded. As she swayed with Blaire, she would let her hands roam with curiosity--Blaire's arms, her back, the nape of her neck. "Growing up, I tried to force myself into a small box, one that the people around me were expecting of me. I thought I had to live with what was in that box. I had to be whoever the box said I had to be. Recently, it's been feeling so cramped and small. I just needed to break out of it."

"You're breaking out of it now," Blaire said. "And what does that feel like? What does this feel like?" She was referencing their swaying, their closeness, her body pressed to Isobel's own. 

"Freeing. Alive. Different, but a good different." Isobel glanced away from Blaire, fixating on everyone around her. "Scary. Overwhelming, like I'm being punched with a fist-full of emotions, ones that I don't understand yet. Or maybe I do understand them. I'm just not accepting them, pushing them away because I just... I don't want to feel..."

Blaire guided Isobel to face her with her fingertips. She let them linger there for a moment, her thumb stroking Isobel's cheek. "Feel what?"

Isobel swallowed, heat rising to her cheeks. She wondered if Blaire felt it under her touch. "I used to be married. That was what I meant, when I said that I just got out of jail."

"That was what I thought you meant. But what does that have to do with... whatever you're feeling or not wanting to feel?" Blaire tucked one of Isobel's wavy strands behind her ear. 

"No. This is weird, talking to you about this. I don't even know you."

"Shouldn't that make it easier? Bartenders are very good listeners."

Isobel giggled and shook her head. "But I don't think you'd want to hear about my piece-of-shit marriage." She paused. "More like my piece-of-shit ex-husband. I don't know if he's the reason why I'm afraid to explore myself. I was tied down for so long, stuck in one place, never moving anywhere, glued to the floor. A part of me doesn't want to open up again. Or maybe I'm fine and it's just being with a woman that scares me."

"It's okay to feel scared, Isobel. I've known for years now, and it still scares me sometimes. But then she kisses me or I kiss her, and I feel bliss. All of that fear is washed away." Blaire pulled away for a moment to spin Isobel, then bringing her back in. "I know that it's not always so easy. Learning to accept who you are will be one of the hardest things you'll have to go through."

"And what if it isn't?" Isobel asked. 

"Then that's okay too." Blaire leaned forward to whisper into Isobel's ear, "Just know, Isobel, don't force yourself to be something you're not."

Isobel gazed at Blaire, her words sticking somewhere in the corners of Isobel's head. She realized how much of that she did during high school, trying so hard to fit in, follow what humans do. But then, she was afraid that if she were to act out of line, people would start to question her. They would start to wonder. Was she really human?

She knew that Blaire was talking about sexuality, but she couldn't help to apply it to human-ness, or her lack of human-ness. She definitely looked human. Inside, she was something else, something she hadn't figured out yet. Who knew when she would. She was twenty-eight and didn't exactly know herself yet. When she thought she had everything in her life put together--

It wasn't. At all. 

Isobel tugged Blaire closer, flooded with warmth. She was under the water again, holding her breath as she dived deeper. Dolphins approached her, swam with her. They embraced her, nudged her with their noses. It was clear that they were trying to tell her something as their high-pitched squeaks and clicks echoed in her ears. She wasn't sure if she wanted to listen yet. 

They kept clicking, whispering in her ears. Isobel tried to focus on the lyrics of the song playing through Planet 7's speakers. How many times had the song changed? This one wasn't like the last. It was softer, more intimate, a hum. 

Could Blaire feel how quickly her heart was beating? See the color in her cheeks in the faded light? Know how calm she made Isobel feel? Now that she wasn't thinking about how weird this felt for her, dancing with someone she didn't expect to dance with tonight. Notice that Isobel might have glanced down at her lips? More than once. They looked soft, like this song. 

What would they feel like on her own? A collision of softness. Sweet and tasty. New, but familiar. Deep and alive. A new burst of emotions, at least new for Isobel. Bliss, just like Blaire said. A pushing and pulling, a fight for dominance. 

As calm as she was, she was too afraid to find out. Despite that, she couldn't help but take another glimpse of Blaire's lips a bit longer this time. When she did, the dolphins' clicking grew louder. They wanted her to kiss Blaire, to feel all of those things she thought she would feel. Isobel wanted to feel that--bliss. 

She stopped swimming and let the waters take her, guide her deeper, reaching the bottom where she started to drown. Blaire was right. It did feel like bliss, and so much more. 


End file.
